I remember when Charlie, my son who has autism, was much younger the hard road we traveled in finding those schools that would help him the best.
At first, inclusion was the most important thing to me. Later, I changed to making sure he was being taught the grade level skills or life and social skills that he needed. I was like a seesaw, back and forth trying to figure out what was best for Charlie.
I was tired of hearing what other kids had or didn’t have, what funding he could not have, or even what he needed or didn’t need and that person hadn’t even met my son. At the time I was fighting for a para to help him in the general education setting. I felt he could do it with just some extra support, but no was the answer over and over again.
My Charlie is now seventeen and a sophomore in high school at a private school. He has been in private and public as well as charter schools (which are public as well). My recommendations are not about public vs. private. It is more about the settings themselves and your specific child’s needs. My experience over the years has been a principal of a special needs private school for nearly nine years, an assistant behavior analyst, and the best one yet—a mother to Charlie.
Here are my 5 important reminders in trying to find a school for your child.
- CHILL- Yes you hear me, chill. You are not good to anyone until you first breathe in and out. We can’t get any point across if we are talking crazy. We can’t get any point across if we are rude. We can’t get any point across if we are angry. Get yourself together when communicating with school personnel. No one wants to listen or help if you are not cooperative and you are demanding. I am going to tell a little secret between me and you. For the last few years when my husband and I went to our son’s IEP meetings, we would each take a water bottle (half full) and one of us would crunch it gently if the other was getting a little testy. We tried to prompt each other to remain calm. A few times my husband left to use the bathroom, but it was really because he was getting too angry and needed to “chill.” As you are navigating your current school situation or looking for others this is the first step you should take.
Source: Special Needs Parenting- Key Ministry
